Untraceable is definately not Unwatchable

Finally, a good thriller!

This one is worth a trip to Blockbuster . . . it reminded me of Seven. Very dark and creepy but smart and effective. Essentially the whole damn world is full of sickos and voyeurs who have become completely desensitized to violence and the suffering of others because the internet serves it up like low fat popcorn . . . now add Diane Lane and simmer.

There were a few bumps- a lot of the internet tech speak is nonsense and I defy you to hack into Onstar and stop my engine – AND cut off my Blackberry in the span of 5 minutes so that I come to a halt in the exact spot you want me on a bridge in the pouring rain . . . but I’m splitting hairs.

It’s a good suspenseful flick that moves right along and doesn’t flinch. Sorta like Silence of the Lambs meets Seven with a dash of Super Mario Brothers.

Ok I’m messing with you about the Mario brothers part, but come on when is the last time you saw me write two paragraphs without a smart ass remark?

Could I get a Large Coffee, Very light, with extra Jihad please?

So obviously the scarf Rachael Ray is wearing above is a direct symbol of terrorism right?

I mean that’s the first thing I thought when I saw it.

And Dunkin Donuts agreed because when some balsam wood reactionary fruit loop with NOTHING better to do then LOOK FOR CRAP to complain about brought it to their attention; Dunkin Donuts folded like a cheap camera and pulled it.

Now Rachael Ray has to do arts and crafts and dish about whatever the hell she dishes about with Oprah all the way from freakin’ Guantanamo Bay.

HEY IMBECILES – Rachael Ray is not a terrorist.

She is annoying as hell on occasion and her goofy laugh may send you looking for a pipe bomb, but you can take my word for the fact that she will never be piloting a 747 into your Donut Shop.

She probably doesn’t even drink that crap anyway.

She strikes me as more of a Bourbon chick – and I would know . . .